By Kabro Go To PostSo how much did you drink and cry during your unemployment?There might've been a few bottles of wine here and there
By s y Go To PostThat was quick. Congratulations.
dat stem life
By Kabro Go To PostSo how much did you drink and cry during your unemployment?
Ask me that
By reilo Go To PostThanks fellas. Gonna be looking to buy a new bottle of scotch this weekend to celebrate.Try some ardbeg.
By s y Go To PostChanged his name too. New year new dataSame mustache.
By FortuneFaded Go To PostSame mustache.
Can't be in law enforcement without one
This is gonna be verbose and unedited.
I'm not quite sure where to post this or if I even should but with this stuff it's easier to be frank on an online forum then with irl friends and family. Was tempted to post this anonymously but that wouldn't be cathartic. It's been forever since I've started noticing issues with my daily life in high school; being treated for Pure-OCD/BPD; nearly destroying my closest friendships because of those obsessions; bumbling into University and finally getting some relief after slowly weening myself off medication and actually being able to hold close relationships without burning them up; then now - months after graduating - back in the valley of wrecked relationships again.
To give more background than needed since I know of no other way to get into this: the biggest issue of my pure-Obsessions was the constant feeling that I was attracted to my childhood friend, in spite of any physical or emotional lust for him. I know it's odd to hear but this was different than any normal crush because there pure fear in knowing that my mind was forcing thoughts that I didn't identify with or want, and the only relief was constant daily rituals to convince myself I was still in control of my urges and sanity. As this was in high school, I naturally overreacted and shared all these details with him. Of course, he says there was no harm done, but this degraded our friendship to the point that he still refuses to initiate personal conversations with me (outside of group gatherings) all this time later. I learned the lesson that this was my struggle and not anyone else's burden - no matter the relief it gave to keep others aware of my daily life. Then last summer - before graduation - I was ready to exit therapy and move on with my life, so I penned a long message to him and a couple others apologising for the uncomfortable situations I'd put them in and my shitty behaviour. They didn't respond at all but I thought: Hey, maybe they just don't care.
Then a few months later, and leading into the now, I have only truly crystallised that thought. They just don't care, not cause they were ready to forgive and forget, they simply didn't think of me as a real person at all. I'd still visit these friends out of convenience, albeit subdued and knowing there's no friendly love there outside of keeping in touch, with them constantly being on edge that I would rush home and detail them my next struggles.
I guess this is a warning that any long relationship can be severed without maleficence and with simple negligence. You can imagine problems that don't exist at all, completely ruining trust with people when acting out of pure fear.
I had spent beyond half a decade continually seeking to be forgiven for both being an actual shitty friend and for things I didn't actually do, my own thoughtcrimes. And now, knowing I don't need forgiveness and realising I won't get that closure - I still need to regain a semblance of self-control, inevitably wrestle back control of my obsessions so I can have days free of rituals and ensure I'm all that's needed in my future relationships; there's literally no other choice since those old bridges are burned now.
Thanks.
I'm not quite sure where to post this or if I even should but with this stuff it's easier to be frank on an online forum then with irl friends and family. Was tempted to post this anonymously but that wouldn't be cathartic. It's been forever since I've started noticing issues with my daily life in high school; being treated for Pure-OCD/BPD; nearly destroying my closest friendships because of those obsessions; bumbling into University and finally getting some relief after slowly weening myself off medication and actually being able to hold close relationships without burning them up; then now - months after graduating - back in the valley of wrecked relationships again.
To give more background than needed since I know of no other way to get into this: the biggest issue of my pure-Obsessions was the constant feeling that I was attracted to my childhood friend, in spite of any physical or emotional lust for him. I know it's odd to hear but this was different than any normal crush because there pure fear in knowing that my mind was forcing thoughts that I didn't identify with or want, and the only relief was constant daily rituals to convince myself I was still in control of my urges and sanity. As this was in high school, I naturally overreacted and shared all these details with him. Of course, he says there was no harm done, but this degraded our friendship to the point that he still refuses to initiate personal conversations with me (outside of group gatherings) all this time later. I learned the lesson that this was my struggle and not anyone else's burden - no matter the relief it gave to keep others aware of my daily life. Then last summer - before graduation - I was ready to exit therapy and move on with my life, so I penned a long message to him and a couple others apologising for the uncomfortable situations I'd put them in and my shitty behaviour. They didn't respond at all but I thought: Hey, maybe they just don't care.
Then a few months later, and leading into the now, I have only truly crystallised that thought. They just don't care, not cause they were ready to forgive and forget, they simply didn't think of me as a real person at all. I'd still visit these friends out of convenience, albeit subdued and knowing there's no friendly love there outside of keeping in touch, with them constantly being on edge that I would rush home and detail them my next struggles.
I guess this is a warning that any long relationship can be severed without maleficence and with simple negligence. You can imagine problems that don't exist at all, completely ruining trust with people when acting out of pure fear.
I had spent beyond half a decade continually seeking to be forgiven for both being an actual shitty friend and for things I didn't actually do, my own thoughtcrimes. And now, knowing I don't need forgiveness and realising I won't get that closure - I still need to regain a semblance of self-control, inevitably wrestle back control of my obsessions so I can have days free of rituals and ensure I'm all that's needed in my future relationships; there's literally no other choice since those old bridges are burned now.
Thanks.
That's tough man. Hopefully it was cathartic for you.
I don't know if your friends didn't care, could be possible that they didn't know how to respond? I don't know.
Have you considered going back to therapy?
I don't know if your friends didn't care, could be possible that they didn't know how to respond? I don't know.
Have you considered going back to therapy?
Glad you shared and I hope it helped.
Sorry to hear that your friends were not there for you, especially as you tried to explain what was going on.
It is good that you know now what you need to do and I wish you the best in getting to the place.
Sorry to hear that your friends were not there for you, especially as you tried to explain what was going on.
It is good that you know now what you need to do and I wish you the best in getting to the place.
Anyone ever just move to a new city/state without visiting it first? Posted months ago me and my gf planned on moving to San Antonio but we decided to wait until her daughter started kindergarten but now we both just wanna get out of NY and thinking about just moving ASAP.
I moved without visiting once, worked out but I wouldn't do that again and I would def visit if the move included another person and a child.
By RobNBanks Go To PostAnyone ever just move to a new city/state without visiting it first? Posted months ago me and my gf planned on moving to San Antonio but we decided to wait until her daughter started kindergarten but now we both just wanna get out of NY and thinking about just moving ASAP.Yeah, me and Hattiesburg for my first job out of college. I knew some friends who moved there recently for a similar line of work and guided me towards the best apartments. I was also single and had nothing tying me back to my former home.
By RobNBanks Go To PostAnyone ever just move to a new city/state without visiting it first? Posted months ago me and my gf planned on moving to San Antonio but we decided to wait until her daughter started kindergarten but now we both just wanna get out of NY and thinking about just moving ASAP.
Why San Antonio?
By s y Go To PostThat's tough man. Hopefully it was cathartic for you.
I don't know if your friends didn't care, could be possible that they didn't know how to respond? I don't know.
Have you considered going back to therapy?
I've considered it but honestly it became a weekly fatigue that didn't really improve me much in the end.
By Shanks D Zoro Go To PostGlad you shared and I hope it helped.
Sorry to hear that your friends were not there for you, especially as you tried to explain what was going on.
It is good that you know now what you need to do and I wish you the best in getting to the place.
Thanks man.
By Smokey Go To PostWhy San Antonio?We’re both homebodies so we don’t really need a thriving nightlife. It’s a “big” city but also supposed to be a quiet one which is something I feel I would prefer. I’ve heard Houston and Dallas are like your typical big cities.
I ain’t trying to be surrounded by Cowboys fans so Dallas isn’t an option and she doesn’t want to go to Houston because of the flood.
By RobNBanks Go To PostWe’re both homebodies so we don’t really need a thriving nightlife. It’s a “big” city but also supposed to be a quiet one which is something I feel I would prefer. I’ve heard Houston and Dallas are like your typical big cities.
I ain’t trying to be surrounded by Cowboys fans so Dallas isn’t an option and she doesn’t want to go to Houston because of the flood.
San Antonio is nothing but Cowboy fans lol.
By RobNBanks Go To PostFor real? DamnBecause they don't have a football team and no one outside Houston likes the Texans.
They got the Spurs why they give a fuck about the cowboys
You've got a kid, so that sounds kinda reckless. I'd check out the school systems, at the very least.
I’ve already done research on that, figuring out which neighborhoods have the better schools. I’ve looked at everything, just haven’t physically been there.
I’m in NY where every school is garbage anyway unless you live in Syosset, Jericho or a 10k a year private school but I’m not a millionaire
I’m in NY where every school is garbage anyway unless you live in Syosset, Jericho or a 10k a year private school but I’m not a millionaire
By RobNBanks Go To PostFor real? Damn
They got the Spurs why they give a fuck about the cowboys
When Oilers left, there was no other team but the Cowboys in the state. And they ONLY have the Spurs to root for. San Antonio is a military town. There's not that much to do outside of the Alamo and other historical places and the Riverwalk. Houston and Dallas are definitely above it, but also much larger.
I can't really blame you for not wanting to come to Houston because of flooding. I've been casually looking at other opportunities and locations since Harvey hit. Over the past 3 years we've had:
2015 - Memorial Day Flood - https://www.chron.com/news/houston-weather/article/Remembering-the-Memorial-Day-Flood-one-America-s-11176375.php
2016 - Tax Day Flood - https://www.chron.com/news/houston-texas/tax-day-flood/
Houston racked up an incredible $459.8 million in damages, placing the Memorial Day Flood as the 14th most costliest flood in American history.
Unfortunately, Houston's flooding problem did not slow down the following year. In 2016, Texas saw more flood victims than any other state, namely due to the April Tax Day Floods in which eight people lost their lives.
In fact, Texas has lead the nation in flood-related deaths for the past 50 years. As a result, flooding is the number one cause of weather-related deaths in Texas.
Even worse, these fatalities might only get worse as Houston flood-prone conditions show no signs of improving.
2017 - Hurricane Fucking Harvey - i dont need a link
By RobNBanks Go To PostDamn Houston stay getting fucked up. What locations have you casually looked at?
I've looked at Dallas and Austin. California as well.
By RobNBanks Go To PostWe’re both homebodies so we don’t really need a thriving nightlife. It’s a “big” city but also supposed to be a quiet one which is something I feel I would prefer. I’ve heard Houston and Dallas are like your typical big cities.
I ain’t trying to be surrounded by Cowboys fans so Dallas isn’t an option and she doesn’t want to go to Houston because of the flood.
You would also have a chance to ditch the knicks and legit become a San Antonio fan and it be your local team........ I envy you
Rob if you need any tips on areas in the city or whatever let me know. My pops played college ball in SA and coached there for a while (even got a few personal items from Pop) and knows ins and outs, I can ask him some stuff.
booked 2 weeks to travel route 66 some in September. Starting in Chicago and finishing in LA. Doesn't feel like it's enough time considering the mileage, but man's can't more time off work.
really hope i didn't break my foot in indoor today. rolled it like neymar trying stepovers and i think i heard a crack. my only encouragement is the fact that i was still able to play after it but now i cant walk
i suppose this is what i get trying to play full out and ignore the fact that i haven't played for 6 months or so.
i suppose this is what i get trying to play full out and ignore the fact that i haven't played for 6 months or so.
By Facism Go To Postbooked 2 weeks to travel route 66 some in September. Starting in Chicago and finishing in LA. Doesn't feel like it's enough time considering the mileage, but man's can't more time off work.I’m guessing you don’t mind driving.
By domino Go To Postreally hope i didn't break my foot in indoor today. rolled it like neymar trying stepovers and i think i heard a crack. my only encouragement is the fact that i was still able to play after it but now i cant walkSounds more like a torn ligament than a broken bone.
i suppose this is what i get trying to play full out and ignore the fact that i haven't played for 6 months or so.
Spent over 300 bucks buying new clothes this weekend. Mixture of online and retail shopping. Tried to be efficient, so nothing fancy. So weird having to dress more professional now lol
Maybe one day I'll be fancy enough where the 300 bucks is for one piece of clothing instead of like 8 lol
Maybe one day I'll be fancy enough where the 300 bucks is for one piece of clothing instead of like 8 lol
By FortuneFaded Go To PostI’m guessing you don’t mind driving.One of my simple pleasures.
By domino Go To Postreally hope i didn't break my foot in indoor today. rolled it like neymar trying stepovers and i think i heard a crack. my only encouragement is the fact that i was still able to play after it but now i cant walk
i suppose this is what i get trying to play full out and ignore the fact that i haven't played for 6 months or so.
About 4 months ago i blocked a shot that caught me right on the top of my big toe from about a yard out, full blast toe poke. It hasn't stopped aching. Had to get on the ibuprofen whenever i had to walk anywhere.
By Shanks D Zoro Go To Post300 won't even get you a nice umbrella.Like I said. One day maybe I can own a shirt that is as much as one of my current paychecks lol
I feel you. I've been slowly replacing my wardrobe due to the weight loss. But then I have shirts and shit that I like that's XL that doesn't fit right anymore and I only bought it like a year and a half ago.
Just received my purple mattress. Was a bitch to bring upstairs
Seems comfortable af though can’t wait to actually sleep on it
Seems comfortable af though can’t wait to actually sleep on it
By RobNBanks Go To PostJust received my purple mattress. Was a bitch to bring upstairsAlways the best moment. When I ordered a new bed and slept on the old mattress on the ground, the night before they delievered it, I barely slept at all. They delievered the bed the next day and build it up rather fast and I got in and slept like a baby.
Seems comfortable af though can’t wait to actually sleep on it
By Apollo Go To PostShanks, I want to teach in Korea. Show me the wayYou want to know the price of scarfs, umbrellas & prostitutes?
IDK why I drank coffee for dinner last night smmfh. No sleep so I'm payin the price with a headache now dammit.
Also, job searchin stress too strok. Someone hold me fam
Also, job searchin stress too strok. Someone hold me fam
By YungMagus Go To PostIDK why I drank coffee for dinner last night smmfh. No sleep so I'm payin the price with a headache now dammit.you changing jobs?
Also, job searchin stress too strok. Someone hold me fam
By blackace Go To Postyou changing jobs?
Yea, I have to, my city layin off ALTs still tryin to stay in Japan tho
By YungMagus Go To PostYea, I have too my city layin off ALTs still tryin to stay in Japan thoThey laying off? That's kinda crazy considering they doubling the alt workload almost next year
By blackace Go To PostThey laying off? That's kinda crazy considering they doubling the alt workload almost next year
Yea,
I mean I can write a lot really I mean a fukkin lot about how my city is "different" and 例外 in regards to ALT treatment/usage.
By YungMagus Go To PostYea,That's wild! Thinking of moving?
I mean I can write a lot really I mean a fukkin lot about how my city is "different" and 例外 in regards to ALT treatment/usage.