Football Thread 2016 | August | A Little Nonsense, Now And Then, Is Relished By The Wisest Men

the French still insist that Matuidi wants Juve.

the door was closed, stop knocking on our windows.

By Arsenal x Juventus Go To PostSo that means Cuadrado is coming back?

and it would be an odd trade, because Dani Alves is doing what Cuadrado does and more, while the Lich King is a defensive minded speed demon.

...but Cuadrado can be straight up winger so I guess that'd be nice. Besides, that's Allegri's problem :lol

As someone (I think it was Meier) said, I don't know if Aguero missing for the derby will make too much of a difference. There's enough variety and ingenuity in the players behind him, and enough quality in Kelechi as a replacement that it's still pretty scary.

The build up to the Manchester derby is going to be better than the actual game.

@United
Borussia Gladbach - He'll play
Bournemouth
@Swansea - EFL Cup

They play Swans again four days later in the league where he would be cleared to play.

There's nothing there that screams they absolutely need him. Their strength is very clearly in their attacking midfielders. Sterling and KDB have been excellent thus far.

By Diego! Go To PostThe build up to the Manchester derby is going to be better than the actual game.

I really can't be arsed with all the Jose vs Pep bollocks.

Maddening levels of narrative spinning.

Welcome Witsel.

Wonder who'll go first between Guidolin and Pulis.

West Brom fans understandably seem to be sick of Pulis. Safe yet stagnant, solid yet shite. They're worse than Stoke ever were, at least Stoke used to be intense.

By Ushojax Go To Post

By Hitch Go To PostWonder who'll go first between Guidolin and Pulis.

West Brom fans understandably seem to be sick of Pulis. Safe yet stagnant, solid yet shite. They're worse than Stoke ever were, at least Stoke used to be intense.

Or Watford's manager? (no I don't know his name and don't care)

Shoddy start for them too.

By Pele.gif Go To PostWilshere looked below average this season for us. Didnt impress for England too at the Euros.

I like the loan idea. He wont get much gametime here with our current squad and his performances atm.

I'm afraid he's on road to be another Walcott. A failed player that didnt achieve what we thought he could. A shame. Wilshere was always very talented, injuries fucked his career.

Good riddance. English fans and teams are obsessed with young english talents that just don't work out and they keep on holding on to them for far too long.

I just googled "english prospects 2014" and looked at this article: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2537574/Football-Leagues-young-guns-The-best-XI-players-21-playing-England.html
The only name I heared before is Callum Wilson, and he's average as fuck. Is that really the best England has to offer? This is terrible, what the fuck are your academies doing?

Guidolin is the only manager in the league I have no time for. Everyone else has either an entertaining narrative or entertaining banter. He's just a competent coach. That's it. There's nothing fun or interesting about him whatsoever.

Rashford>Benteke

There are some really good young English players, or at least some with great potential. Luckily, we have a couple of them; Shaw is genuinely fantastic and Rashford is great.

Sterling is still young and is already showing how good he can be under a manager who coaches and uses him effectively, same for Alli last year.

Are they overhyped? Sure. Doesn't mean they aren't good.

Lich King had to ruin it

By n8 dogg Go To PostGuidolin is the only manager in the league I have no time for. Everyone else has either an entertaining narrative or entertaining banter. He's just a competent coach. That's it. There's nothing fun or interesting about him whatsoever.

the most fun thing about him is how he buckles mentally under pressure :lol it happens every time :lol expect him to be in a hospital bed with his assistant taking over OR threatening to quit and/or retire when they're in a relegation battle

I guess you could say he's the equivalent of Yurt on the internet


but you'd be wrong because emperor Yurt is not like that

I'm worried about what Gomez's injuries will have taken out of him :(

Shaw-Holding-Gomez-Clyne future

Ciaran > yurt

Depay
Lingard
Ibrahimovic
Carrick
Blind

Fosu-Mensah
Pogba
Rooney
Herrera
Jones

Fellaini
Valencia

Well, Guidolin was in a hospital bed when we lost 2-1 to them with their assistant manager taking over for that game last season :lol :lol

Shit was embarrassing yo

By n8 dogg Go To PostCiaran > yurt

Suarez should've called Evra a Ciaran. He would've gotten away with it, and Evra would've only reacted AFTER googling it at home in horror

"Blacky in gaelic? What?! No, I was just asking him about a quest in Dark Souls"

Cunt
Knob
Gaping vagina
Fuckhead
Cunt again
Cunt again
Wanker
Yeast infection

Clithood
Tit
Twat
Fanny

Fart
Cunt again

Higs in McDonalds. Well, that would certainly explain it.

Sanchez
Holding
Mustafi
Mertesacker

Oxlade-Chamberlain
Ramsey

I've noticed the most talented young English players these days often peak when they are young and fail to push on and become world class. They usually stop developing around the time they get that first big contract which sets them up for life.

Nate I reckon you'd love him after this

2012

Guidolin has often struggled with the stress of the job and threatened to quit on other occasions, even taking up yoga to help him deal with the strain

Francesco Guidolin has threatened to quit Udinese after defeat to Torino. “If I am the problem, I’ll walk away. I suffer too much.”

They lost 2-0 at home to Toro today, meaning they have lost three of their last four games at the Stadio Friuli.

“If I realise that I am the problem, then I am prepared to walk away. I have done it before in my career and am entirely ready to do so again, if needed,” the Coach told Sky Sport Italia.

“I care about Udinese too much, so I suffer too much for this team. Perhaps I transmit some of that suffering to the team and they subconsciously absorb it.

“If I realise that I am a problem rather than a resource for the club, then of course I would step aside. I haven’t spoken to the club, I am just telling you this.”

2013 before the CL preliminary rounds :lol

" I am very tired and need to rest. I think I’m going to need a long rest, as I am under a lot of strain and I don’t know if my health can hold up to another season like this with over 50 matches.

“In the next few days I will talk to the directors, because I feel the need to go off grid and stop for a while, so I don’t know if I’ll be ready for the start of July."

AFTER losing the preliminary rounds on penalties

Francesco Guidolin has hinted he may resign after Udinese's Champions League elimination at the hands of Sporting Braga last night.

Guidolin spoke with a tremble in his voice and was clearly extremely upset after the 1-1 play-off draw, leading to a penalty shoot-out elimination.

"This is causing us enormous pain. I have nothing else to add. I thank my players for giving their absolute all tonight, each drop of sweat and they could not have given more," said Guidolin.

"I am immensely sorry for me, for the players and for the fans. Evidently I am not capable of leading a team into the Champions League. When you get so close several times and can't go through, you have to learn from that experience and accept the truth.

"Sporting Braga did better over the two legs, so they deserved to go through. Unfortunately we were incapable of giving more and the Coach has to take responsibility, because a team like Udinese ought to play better.

"I blame the Coach, as the team should've been more prepared for this play-off. Sport is raw and cruel, so there is no need to sugar-coat it or make things seem nicer than they are.

"I am going home now to hopefully rest and reflect on the situation. That is all."

Jesus Guidolin Christ

By n8 dogg Go To PostCunt
Knob
Gaping vagina
Fuckhead
Cunt again
Cunt again
Wanker
Yeast infection

Clithood
Tit
Twat
Fanny

Fart
Cunt again

There are a lot of cunts in Coventry.

Loool what a wet fucking blanket. I hate him even more now. Crybaby.

HOLY SHIT :looool

Sassuolo's 2-1 win over Pescara turned into a 0-3 loss because they fielded an ineligible player (Ragusa) in the match

Anyone signed up for the Battlefield 1 beta?

By n8 dogg Go To PostAs someone (I think it was Meier) said, I don't know if Aguero missing for the derby will make too much of a difference. There's enough variety and ingenuity in the players behind him, and enough quality in Kelechi as a replacement that it's still pretty scary.

They still are scary as you've got Sterling and Nolito now to worry about without Agüero, but he has played well in every Manc derby I can think of, so it'll be a big miss. He's the star in that match up.

Sporting apparently have rejected Leicesters bid for Slimani

By Zabojnik Go To Post

Higs in McDonalds. Well, that would certainly explain it.

Lol Higuaín is a little husky for a world class striker. That man is not Gonzalo Higuaín. That man is straight chunk.

By Ciaran Go To PostHOLY SHIT :looool

What!!!!!!!!!!!!

Does that mean Berardi's goal is removed from the record books?

I did think it was strange that he was playing as I only saw it announced the day before.

@Odd

that was a splendid finale in so many ways. And yeah, it did redeem a few stupid storylines :lol

the last shot was fantastic. And I hope Materazzi gets nominated for something at the very least

By Arsenal x Juventus Go To PostDoes that mean Berardi's goal is removed from the record books?
.

it's okay Shanks we can continue to count it as long as we say 'sul campo' ;)

By Ciaran Go To Post@Odd

that was a splendid finale in so many ways. And yeah, it did redeem a few stupid storylines :lol

the last shot was fantastic

it's okay Shanks we can continue to count it as long as we say 'sul campo' ;)

Nice. Glad you liked it.

By Hitch Go To PostRashford>Benteke

Hopefully he is.
But LFC also fails victim to what I said. They will fail to win anything with 80% possession and fucking Jo Henderson on the pitch. Dude is as creatively bankrupt as Tim Cook. And ultimatively too fucking average to fill the gigantic shoes left by someone as Gerrard.
Sturridge, he's exactly the same type of problem player as Jack Wilshere. People just clamering on saying "Once he'll get fit he'll get there and lead us to titles." but maybe he doesn't get fit anymore. Maybe his legs are gone for good now.
Maybe he should get ditched and you should give other players the opportunity instead of holding on to something that might never be.

EFL trophy starts tonight which for the first time will have some of the top academies u23 sides playing against league one and two teams. Going to be interesting to see how the youngsters do.

By Oddinho Go To PostLol Higuaín is a little husky for a world class striker. That man is not Gonzalo Higuaín. That man is straight chunk.

Sure. What next, this guy isn't Matthew Fox / bud?

How much was Higuain? €70m+? Juve must value players like most people would value fruit and veg. By the kilo. That explains why they won't pay up the cash Chelsea want for featherweight Cuadrado.

By Diego! Go To PostHow much was Higuain? €70m+? Juve must value players like most people would value fruit and veg. By the kilo. That explains why they won't pay up the cash Chelsea want for featherweight Cuadrado.

We didn't value him at 70 million, that was a release clause.

release clauses never reflect market value for obvious reasons.

but touche...that actually makes since :lol Cuadrado better be eating like a pig Higuain as we speak

Couple of points re arsenal:

Jack needs consistent playing time period. For me right now it's not even about how good you are or can be (and believe me at peak he's probably the best CM out of santi/ramsey/elneny) it's can you play 30 games a season. We cant trust having him as a bit part/utility player this season for him to only break down after playing intensity ramps up because we make him our CM next season. Santi is what 31 so we could potentially ease him in first half and reduce santi's playig time when he gets tired (santi is strangely inconsistent at times) but again you have Ramsey who will be wanting to play there. I don't really care as they all solid players and offer different things so I'm sure we can cope if he stays or goes.

Ramsey is another one I think people will be looking at this season with a watchful eye. He's not just living off that one season either, that's ignorant, he's a very very good CM but the truth is no one knows exactly what his level is. Wedward made one of the most insightful points about him needing to be next to a deep lying ball player but yeah he needs to find his level. Is he euro's, arsenal vs leciester Ramsey or the Ramsey we saw for the majority of the back end of last season.

Another thing that's gunna probably happen but fucking annoy me, stop playing Ramsey on the RW. Previously with Giroud playing and santi missing our build up had to be a lot slower/methodical, basically we would try and pass through the lines to bring play up to final third then switch tempo and look for incisive pass or cross. With xhaka seemingly able to spray it from deep it makes so much more sense having guys who are gunna push play out wide and stretch teams rather than playing cute triangles around the box.

Mario Balotelli looks increasingly more unlikely to head over to Palermo as Liverpool would rather loan him in England.

he's so crap that Liverpool doesn't even care if he goes to a domestic rival :lol

Draxler to PSG could be happening imminently. £61 million.

I wish it was the derby already. Long over due revenge for The Assassination of Zlatan Ibrahimovic by the Coward Pep Guardiola

International breaks are complete horseshit.

are Juve currently making a profit in this window?

Zenit coach Lucescu "We received a serious bid from Everton for Witsel, but he rejected. Now we have 2 days to agree a deal with Juventus."

🦄

By Vivalapizzaare Juve currently making a profit in this window?

Yes.

third year in a row.

We went from -100 million in 2010 to -7 in 2013.

Have PSG felt left out with all the big spending going on this summer? Screams of look at us we can spend loads of money too.

By inky Go To PostDamn Weddy, you really missed your chance to be a petty spelling nazi and have a cheap shot here. There are internet arguments to be won. Your love for Arsenal is too big.

Hitch already dealt that mortal blow.

Years from now the only thing Slaenters will remember was the time the Napolol supporter failed to proofread his post.

Ah, the ignominy that'll chase me through all the circles of hell.

Flabber's grammatical mishap is proof that even Gods can bleed

Figured Draxler would be on the move when Wolfsburg started bidding for Son.

Could have had Chadli if they wanted.