The Atlantic : My Family's Slave
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Didn't know where to post this but I think this is a fascinating, infuriating, complex article that deserves to be read by everyone.
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Sometimes is hard to forget that slavery still exists in this world and this is a case that happen in modern times in the USA.
The ashes filled a black plastic box about the size of a toaster. It weighed three and a half pounds. I put it in a canvas tote bag and packed it in my suitcase this past July for the transpacific flight to Manila. From there I would travel by car to a rural village. When I arrived, I would hand over all that was left of the woman who had spent 56 years as a slave in my family’s household.
Full article
Sometimes is hard to forget that slavery still exists in this world and this is a case that happen in modern times in the USA.
I read that this morning on my way to work. It's a really heartbreaking and messed up tale. The thing I found bizarre about it is that the story ends up being written as a sympathetic tale of everyone involved, including the mother (but not the father since he was long gone out of their lives). I understand the son eventually found peace with his mother, but man was she brutal. There were moments I really didn't know how to process some of the things that were happening throughout the lives especially from his parents perspectives. What a messed up world.
There are so many layers of "fucked" to that story. His justification for his mother's actions seems like it's less of something he's giving the reader about his mom for sympathy, but rather shed light on his own internal struggles. Story is complete with the slave needing the owner too.
I understand the moral dilemma of helping this woman or destroying your family is a difficult one for a child. By the own authors admission though, it took him until 23 before he lost it with his mom and then dealt with the issue by largely ignoring the problem and moving to Seattle.
Shades of gray and all, but I didn't read that and leave thinking the author was a god person.
Shades of gray and all, but I didn't read that and leave thinking the author was a god person.
Craziest part is the authored died right before they published this. I would of loved to have heard an interview from him to see how he justified being a "kindly" slave owner.
By Zeus Ex Machina Go To PostCraziest part is the authored died right before they published this. I would of loved to have heard an interview from him to see how he justified being a "kindly" slave owner.
I think it's better this way. Let the man have his catharsis in death.
By Zeus Ex Machina Go To PostCraziest part is the authored died right before they published this. I would of loved to have heard an interview from him to see how he justified being a "kindly" slave owner.
I very much doubt that he believes himself to be a "kindly" slave owner. It's hard to view his story through American lenses when so much of it is about his own Filipino ancestry
Here's a good take on it: https://medium.com/kang-blog/alex-tizon-rip-again-518c197db57
I'm less sympathetic than Kang here, but i largely agreement with his sentiment on the writing itself.
By Fenderputty Go To PostI understand the moral dilemma of helping this woman or destroying your family is a difficult one for a child. By the own authors admission though, it took him until 23 before he lost it with his mom and then dealt with the issue by largely ignoring the problem and moving to Seattle.
Shades of gray and all, but I didn't read that and leave thinking the author was a god person.
The author wrote this to get it off his chest, but he doesn't think himself blameless - he feels guilt and trepidation at facing the family right up through the funeral. He acknowledges that it was terrible and wrong, and that he was pained by seeing this happen to a woman who was more of a parent to him than his own biological parents. He couldn't just get her out of there and send her home because she was an illegal, she'd be arrested. He worked to get her naturalized. When he offered to help her leave she didn't want to go. I know everybody on the internet thinks this is really clear and they'd just bravely stare down the family and emancipate her, but it's obvious this wasn't that simple, that in between the nastiness familial attachment had developed on both sides - remember that it was this woman's own natural family who had sold her out to begin with.
By livefromkyoto Go To PostThe author wrote this to get it off his chest, but he doesn't think himself blameless - he feels guilt and trepidation at facing the family right up through the funeral. He acknowledges that it was terrible and wrong, and that he was pained by seeing this happen to a woman who was more of a parent to him than his own biological parents. He couldn't just get her out of there and send her home because she was an illegal, she'd be arrested. He worked to get her naturalized. When he offered to help her leave she didn't want to go. I know everybody on the internet thinks this is really clear and they'd just bravely stare down the family and emancipate her, but it's obvious this wasn't that simple, that in between the nastiness familial attachment had developed on both sides - remember that it was this woman's own natural family who had sold her out to begin with.
The amount of outrage does reek a certain level of unfamiliarity with the immigrant experience for sure. She was a slave, but our government's immigration policies are enablers to her condition. We can blame slave owners for being terrible people, pin all responsibility on them and feel good about ourselves, but I think a level of introspection is required here.
Filing this under modern slave narratives, including the neo- slave kind. Peculiar intricacies such as Lola's inability to behave like anything other than a slave even after mother's death... Before mother's death, Lola's infatuation with Mother, dare I say friendship if not also kinship. The Embrace of the author's children as if they were her own grandchildren. Even with the option to be free in her native land, America is home.
By livefromkyoto Go To PostThe author wrote this to get it off his chest, but he doesn't think himself blameless - he feels guilt and trepidation at facing the family right up through the funeral. He acknowledges that it was terrible and wrong, and that he was pained by seeing this happen to a woman who was more of a parent to him than his own biological parents. He couldn't just get her out of there and send her home because she was an illegal, she'd be arrested. He worked to get her naturalized. When he offered to help her leave she didn't want to go. I know everybody on the internet thinks this is really clear and they'd just bravely stare down the family and emancipate her, but it's obvious this wasn't that simple, that in between the nastiness familial attachment had developed on both sides - remember that it was this woman's own natural family who had sold her out to begin with.
Ohhh for sure. He tried to make amends. I brought up her not wanting to leave too. Like Stockholm syndrome to some extent. I realize there's cultural factors at play as well as economic factors for the family as well. It's a gray matter and not black and white.
Still ... we gotta draw lines in the sand at some point and this seem like a pretty easy line to draw. I mean ... the author tries his hardest to portray his mother in the best possible way he could. You could see the mental gynmastics his brain is going through.
Why not take her to Seattle though? Why just leave and stop coming around?