Great-grandmother. But one of the reasons I went back home back in October was to talk to her one last time. I did, and it was great. She's almost 100 and the family has been taking care of her knowing she was in failing health for the past decade really.
I hate funerals, but this whole trip for me feels like an unfair obligation. And after my mom died when I was younger, I don't want to be anywhere near my family while they're grieving. I have to become this stoic foundation piece for everyone and while it helps them immensely, it leaves me mindfucked for months or longer. We weren't even that close, she just liked me because I was a part of the family that wasn't a constant fuck up or junkie status.
I might still go but I'm dreading this shit like I'm already there.
I hate funerals, but this whole trip for me feels like an unfair obligation. And after my mom died when I was younger, I don't want to be anywhere near my family while they're grieving. I have to become this stoic foundation piece for everyone and while it helps them immensely, it leaves me mindfucked for months or longer. We weren't even that close, she just liked me because I was a part of the family that wasn't a constant fuck up or junkie status.
I might still go but I'm dreading this shit like I'm already there.
By s y Go To Postyou know the person closely?
yeah, you're probably fucked. Hopefully it isn't too bad considering her age and the fact that she's been in declining health for a few years.
I feel like you have to go to that. Just stay in a hotel and pop in for the funeral, shake some hands. Kiss some babies and bounce if you don't actually want to be there.
At least that way they can't lord it over you like "DY wouldn't even come to his great grandmothers funeral" cause you know they will. I'm still tight my cousin didnt come to our grandma's funeral because he didn't want to take off work for it. She was too good to us for him to pull that shit.
At least that way they can't lord it over you like "DY wouldn't even come to his great grandmothers funeral" cause you know they will. I'm still tight my cousin didnt come to our grandma's funeral because he didn't want to take off work for it. She was too good to us for him to pull that shit.
Maaaaaan, you can't ever "pop in" for a funeral, especially (I'm guessing) if you're not around your family all the time. It's gonna be an all day drag.
For context, I'd probably be preaching at this church if I'd stayed in NC. This is all happening around a historical black church in NC and my greatgrandmother was the oldest living member for the last few years. They're going to make a parade out of this probably.
I'm going to try one last time to get out of this in a few but no matter how I do it things won't go smooth.
I'm going to try one last time to get out of this in a few but no matter how I do it things won't go smooth.
OK that sounds like a totally different beast. With that context I definitely think you have to go now š
The hassle around you not going would probably be worse than going.
The hassle around you not going would probably be worse than going.
By s y Go To PostMaaaaaan, you can't ever "pop in" for a funeral, especially (I'm guessing) if you're not around your family all the time. It's gonna be an all day drag.Well I meant like pop in for the day. Not JUST the funeral lol.
By DY_nasty Go To PostFor context, I'd probably be preaching at this church if I'd stayed in NC. This is all happening around a historical black church in NC and my greatgrandmother was the oldest living member for the last few years. They're going to make a parade out of this probably.
I'm going to try one last time to get out of this in a few but no matter how I do it things won't go smooth.
Sorry about your great grandmother. Family expectations for these sort of thins can be ... odd.
I wonder about this alternate timeline in which you're a preacher though. Does this version of you troll?
By DY_nasty Go To PostThat version of me is the biggest asshole ever.
At least it would be sanctioned by God.
By DY_nasty Go To PostThat version of me is the biggest asshole ever.O/U of number of acknowledged kids that version has is set at 3.5.
By FortuneFaded Go To PostAnd every village has their idiot.
Guess which member of the village you are?
By Apollo Go To PostGuess which member of the village you are?The cowboy or the construction worker.
By domino Go To PostI feel like you have to go to that. Just stay in a hotel and pop in for the funeral, shake some hands. Kiss some babies and bounce if you don't actually want to be there.My dad was real clear that no one needs to come to his because it won't do shit for him...
At least that way they can't lord it over you like "DY wouldn't even come to his great grandmothers funeral" cause you know they will. I'm still tight my cousin didnt come to our grandma's funeral because he didn't want to take off work for it. She was too good to us for him to pull that shit.
Guess I can update that a bit.
Told my grandma and aunts I ain't going. Fuck it, most of my family forgot what I looked like anyways and I'll be damned if I show up like Gandalf to light the way forward. I'll pay my respects in my own way, but it's not worth going into another spiral of depression dealing with family again.
Told my grandma and aunts I ain't going. Fuck it, most of my family forgot what I looked like anyways and I'll be damned if I show up like Gandalf to light the way forward. I'll pay my respects in my own way, but it's not worth going into another spiral of depression dealing with family again.
Think I'm going to cut back on my facebook use drastically.
Shit just makes me either passive aggressive, petty, or lonely.
Shit just makes me either passive aggressive, petty, or lonely.
By data Go To PostThink I'm going to cut back on my facebook use drastically.Facebook does nothing good for mental health. It's worth keeping messenger and notifications just to keep in contact with people, but never, ever just browse it.
Shit just makes me either passive aggressive, petty, or lonely.
By Kibner Go To PostFacebook does nothing good for mental health. It's worth keeping messenger and notifications just to keep in contact with people, but never, ever just browse it.I'm one of the few who can just browse it and walk away.
That's certainly not for everyone.
I'm one of the few who can just browse it and walk away.Lol same. Reading some of the posts in here anytime FB is mentioned always catches me off guard.
Yeah it's easy for me to stop by FB for a few minutes, see what's up, and then just log off. May not check it again for like a week either.
If fb fucks with someone that much they got other issues and or they need a good scrub of their feed/friend list.
By Smokey Go To PostYeah it's easy for me to stop by FB for a few minutes, see what's up, and then just log off. May not check it again for like a week either.I'll check it 2 or 3 times a day, for about 5 minutes. If there's nothing interesting i move on.
It's much more like a news aggregator for me though.
I've never understood how / why people get into long wars on face book. But then, i've got 20 years of petty posting on forums.
By Random Ass Username Go To PostIf fb fucks with someone that much they got other issues and or they need a good scrub of their feed/friend list.
I truly believe the latter, for arguments sake.
I hate when someone links to Facebook assuming everyone can view the content but it's locked behind an account wall. Not everyone uses the site.
By Random Ass Username Go To PostIf fb fucks with someone that much they got other issues and or they need a good scrub of their feed/friend list.Eh.
Like a bunch of friends/family use FB alot. Especially those empty pictures with some shitty text are triggering me :P
But who gives a fuck, I mainly browse through my university groups when I need to or when I can help somebody. For the rest of the time I'll just avoid FB and use the messenger app on my phone, but that's about it.
By Random Ass Username Go To PostIf fb fucks with someone that much they got other issues and or they need a good scrub of their feed/friend list.It's more of seeing the best of your friends and families lives and how that plays into the psyche of many who already deal with depression.
By GQman2121 Go To PostDoes the messenger app work in conjunction with Whatsapp?Different apps.
WhatsApp got the phone contacts and FB the FB contacts.
By Kibner Go To PostIt's more of seeing the best of your friends and families lives and how that plays into the psyche of many who already deal with depression.Guess I got lucky with my pals, I get food and honesty (not always seeing the best, statuses about depression instead) and memes. I think if fb is honestly making someone feel worse about where they are it's best to go talk that out and limit exposure.
By Pennywise Go To PostDifferent apps.Oh so that's why I know no one who uses the latter.
WhatsApp got the phone contacts and FB the FB contacts.
By domino Go To PostFacebook feels like going to Walmart. I cant fuck with it.You never go to Walmart???
By Random Ass Username Go To PostGuess I got lucky with my pals, I get food and honesty (not always seeing the best, statuses about depression instead) and memes. I think if fb is honestly making someone feel worse about where they are it's best to go talk that out and limit exposure.A lot of people are hesitant to put that kind of stuff out there because of how public Facebook profiles are by default and the nature of those kinds of things being shameful among their circles.
My friends talk about their struggles, but usually communicate that stuff on platforms like discord and other "invite only" type deals. Several tried it on Facebook and had to create alternate pseudo accounts that are set to as private as possible to get away from conflicts it caused with close friends and family.
My biggest annoyance with fb lately is the way they're filtering statuses. Even when I go to most recent, it's filtering out a lot of my friend's stuff.
By Random Ass Username Go To PostMy biggest annoyance with fb lately is the way they're filtering statuses. Even when I go to most recent, it's filtering out a lot of my friend's stuff.That's a trend with all major social media platforms unfortunately. My Instagram feed just shows me random shit, same with Twitter. Im gonna start using Tweetdeck because iiirc that fixes that issue. They should make a similar app for IG.
I only look at Instagram for asses and only once or twice a week, if that, because I don't like or understand why posts are not listed in the order in which they've been made. I just lose interest when I see a date that's a week old on the second or third image in the timeline. Show me the up to the date shit and I'll give you my up to the date attention.
How does the selection process even work? Why are there no options?
How does the selection process even work? Why are there no options?
By GQman2121 Go To PostI only look at Instagram for asses and only once or twice a week, if that, because I don't like or understand why posts are not listed in the order in which they've been made. I just lose interest when I see a date that's a week old on the second or third image in the timeline. Show me the up to the date shit and I'll give you my up to the date attention.
This is me. Which is hilarious because instagram started using that shitty algorithm tying to you people you should/may be interested and things you've missed. Happened over the summer some time. I literally have used the app once since.
EDIT: two summers ago lol
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/2016/06/06/why-your-instagram-feed-is-now-out-of-order/
I went grocery shopping today and when I saw king cakes at the entrance, it reminded me that I talked about king cakes in the NBA thread a couple nights ago and now I'm all craving them. So I picked one up. Bavarian filling on this one as I haven't tried that before.
By joefu Go To PostDon't eat the baby!They don't come with the baby inside the cake anymore. It is separate and you have to put it in there yourself.
By RobNBanks Go To PostSocial media is the devil /oldman
*daps*
By Kibner Go To PostThey don't come with the baby inside the cake anymore. It is separate and you have to put it in there yourself.Boo. That's no fun
By DY_nasty Go To PostI blame domino for getting me into instagram thirst traps
I check this shit every day now
it has been about a month since i updated that thread...
people with glasses, how often do yall wear them?
i've always hated wearing mine but i think i have to now. i only used to wear them in class to see the board.
i've always hated wearing mine but i think i have to now. i only used to wear them in class to see the board.
Used to rock glasses, but went back to contacts. It just makes life easier. I can be near a computer with contacts on but it's harder on my stigmatism with glasses, so I don't wear them if I am close enough. Plus I can rock any pair of shades and still see.